I wanted to love you. Whip cream? Strawberries? You had the potential to be a great cake. But you’re not. You’re an awful cake. You tricked me in the summer of ’97 when I was a small child. I bit into you with all the confidence in the world only to be ridiculously disappointed and horrified. You stink Angel food cake! Your biggest flaw is that damn texture; it’s atrocious. I’ve come to realize that AFC is a low-fat cake, and THERE’s your red flag. That’s like walking into KFC and asking for a low-fat Double-Down sandwich. It’s preposterous!!